Things We Should Do More of: Be Nice to Each Other

May 3, 2016


When I was pregnant I felt anything but beautiful. I’m 5’3 and was basically as round as I was tall. But this really strange and wonderful thing kept happening- women (and sometimes men) would actually stop me, on the street, in the grocery store, paying for parking- and tell me how beautiful I looked. Now for anyone who was there we all know this was a bold faced lie, but it was the most lovely of lies. It’s something I carried forward and now make sure to tell pregnant women I see. Because we all know how shitty and large you can feel when expecting, so how nice to tell a total stranger that they’re wearing it well. So that’s what I propose we do, take the time to compliment each other more. New moms, expecting moms, all moms- we’re freaking exhausted and doing our best and sometimes an unexpected compliment from a total stranger is weirdly super validating and amazing.

Ideas for compliments, keep them simple and authentic:

  • You look beautiful
  • It gets easier and more amazing everyday (except when they’re teething, crawling, walking, sick or tired- but it’s like suuuuuper great)

These are not compliments, no matter how nicely you say them:

  • You’re not nearly as big as my wife as when she was pregnant
  • Your ankles will go back down to regular size after the baby comes
  • You look exhausted/frazzled/anything other than lovely
  • Are you pregnant again?! (No. Asshole.)
  • Have you tried (insert random fad here)? (Go away)

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1 Comment

  • Reply Caryn Osterbrink Ross May 4, 2016 at 2:23 am

    Oh, such a delicate subject. My friend a few years back had a surprise pregnancy..while we thought she was starting changes early, oh she was changing..having her 3rd child..surprise! When she was well into her pregnancy and out with her older children, someone came up to her and said congrats..but wow what an age it harder when you are older..really!!! Be not judge or make assumptions to anyone pregnant, how they got pregnant, when and why and how old or young they are. Embrace the new life coming their way and just look fantastic and congrats and offer support or help if they need it. That is it..why do people feel so compelled to comment..just be nice. It is that simple.
    Stay positive in makes it so much easier, especially with children.

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