So I recently got asked what the best advice my mom gave me about motherhood. I actually had to think about it for a while, mostly because my mom has taught me just about everything I know about being a mom and I think she’s given me a boat load of epic advice. I may be just a tad biased… but my mom is the shit!
After filtering through the piles of advice and knowledge she’s given me over the past 18 months (ie: helping me evolve from a shaking, crying, neurotic mess into a happy, calm, neurotic mom) I settled on the best advice she gave me.
You were a wife before you were a mom.
So maybe this doesn’t seem that insightful and brilliant, but trust me, it is. I don’t know about you, but when JJ was born I kind of forgot I had a husband some days. I lovingly bathed, fed, and cared for JJ; and forgot to cuddle, kiss and feed the first love of my life, Scott.
Those simple words from my mom reminded (and continue to remind) me that a happy partnership is what’s best for us all. That I want my child to grow up knowing that it gives me as much joy to make his daddy happy as it does for me to take care of him. That we have enough love, kindness (and patience) to care for every member of our little family.
So in the same way that I actively engage with and care for my son, I endeavour to do the same with my hubby. Which is easier said than done, ‘cause at the end of the day we’re all effing tired. So I’m by no means getting it right all the time, (sometimes momma just needs shitty tv on the couch at the end of the day!) but I make sure to prioritize my marriage and husband in the same way I prioritize my kiddo.
My parents are the blueprint of a loving, supportive married couple who managed to raise loving, compassionate, curious children while shuttling us from country to country our entire childhood. So I’m down to try whatever they suggest!