Mom Stuff Motherlucker

Plans For New Plans

October 17, 2017
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Sometimes, life doesn’t turn out the way you expect it to.

A stay at home mom was not on my vision board and it’s certainly not on my resume. Not that there is anything wrong with that. If there is one thing I’ve learned over the course of these last 9 months, is that motherhood is equally amazing, joyful, heartfelt, hard and exhausting. Mentally exhausting. I praise those who stay at home all day, every day with their kids.  It was just never ‘me’ and I loved my career so much that I knew I would be the type of woman who needed the balance of motherhood and work.

Well plans have changed…for now.

I parted ways with my last employer because it wasn’t working out. It was mutual and I’m thankful for that. It was a job I took out of necessity and well, desperation I guess, not passion (HUGE lesson learned here!). I struggled each day with the work I was doing and the fact that I hated it and sacrificed spending time with my son. Things were out of balance. I felt it in my mind, my heart, my whole body.

Time to make new plans, I thought. What was it that I truly wanted out of life? My career? Partnership? Motherhood? I had no clue. I was stuck. I was and still am lost because I’m so out of my comfort zone, I get paralyzed, don’t know how to cope and often complaining is my default behaviour (sorry husband-to-be).

Here’s the deal: Blowing out of your comfort zone can be life changing and you really do become what you believe, so I guess I’m just going to have to have faith in knowing I am responsible for the changes I seek out. The person I want to become, the new plans I hope to make, valuing the time I have with my son, my spouse, my friends, my (hopefully) soon-to-be job. Quit the bitching, complaining, poor-me mentality, count my blessings and just grab my future by the balls and go with it. After all, I have to do it, no one else will do it for me.

It’s time for change and to make a plan…for new plans.

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