Browsing Tag

mom life


The Clothes Make The Kid

April 20, 2017

Baby clothes might just be the best thing about becoming a parent. The styles we love, only way, way tinier. Nothing is cuter than a toddler in skinny jeans, I mean come on. Or hammer pants. Or the teensiest little high tops, like months before he will ever walk. A pair of baby wayfarers or teeny suede loafers can incite a Kardashian-level frenzy from strangers, photo ops and all. I love everything about dressing my kids. I’ve even been known to iron a size 2T dress or two in my day, and my laundry skills should be highlighted in my LinkedIn profile. Now don’t get me wrong, there have been a few early morning latté runs in full pajamas (them, not me – though my mom uniform of tip-to-toe Lululemon is still on repeat, four years in – but we’ll save that for another blog). But for the most part, I take pride in leaving the house with well-dressed, well-pressed little munchkins.

So it was a bit of a shock for me when my son started insisting on picking his outfits, ultimatum-style. It started innocently enough when he insisted on a t-shirt over the sweater I’d laid out one Canadian winter day, but quickly devolved into his entire look, jacket and accessories included. Accessories!? You’re two! I realize that kids want to assert their independence and that it can manifest in all sorts of ways… I know that it’s important to give them the freedom to express themselves. And I gotta say, I love that we’re raising strong-willed, creative and opinionated little beings. I know this will serve them well later in life, but sometimes I just want them to go out into the world in shoes that match the outfit – or at least the weather (bubble gum pink Hunter boots in August, I’m looking at you). It’s like they have radar for the most inappropriate, mismatched pieces. I literally dove across the room one December morning to conceal a rogue sundress and keep it out of my daughter’s peripheral vision. I left the house that day in a sling. She left in a sundress.

Yet as bad as their self-styled #ootds can be, I know it could be a zillion times worse. There’s a girl in my son’s preschool who shows up every single day in full Elsa (or is it Anna?) kit – long blonde braided wig, plastic high heels and all. Her mom has chosen not to pick that particular battle and I don’t blame her. But my goodness, that dress could use a Tide Pod and a new zipper. I’ll take the brown “penny loapers” with the black skinny jeans over that any day.  


Motherlucker Parenting

My Second Favorite F-Word

I don’t know about you, but I’m a big fan of the F-word. It’s extremely versatile and can be used in so many different situations. As a writer, I love that it can be a noun, verb, adjective, and more. As a mom, it…

April 19, 2017
Blended Family Motherlucker Parenting

Stepmommy Judging

For some people, hearing the word stepmom makes them cringe. I don’t know why this happens. Some people blame it on Disney, some people say it’s from “personal experience,” some insinuate it’s because of religion and some people, I think, just fear the unknown.…

April 13, 2017
Food Mom Advice Motherlucker

The Madness Called Mealtime

Until you live with a tiny human (or a couple of them), you have no idea how harrowing mealtime can actually be.  I envisioned my sweet family gathered around the table, laughing, talking about our day, all eating the same delicious home cooked meal…

April 12, 2017
Mom Stuff Motherlucker

It’s The Small Things

OK mamas, you’ll know what I’m talking about here. You know those days when you just need five minutes to yourself? No, how about five HOURS? But you Just. Can’t. Seem. To. Get. Any There are those days where you are at your wits’…

April 10, 2017
Mom Stuff Motherlucker Parenting

School Drama

We’re currently in the midst of preschool application/acceptance season. And it’s effing nuts. I’m too exhausted to get into the whole shitstorm of how it works but I have a lot to say about what the process does to us mentally. Listen up, preschool…

April 4, 2017
Mom Stuff Motherlucker

The Post Baby Body – 6 weeks, My Ass

Snapping Back Isn’t Real When You Don’t Recognize Your Own Body. Three years ago, I decided to push myself physically for the first time. I trained and ran the LA Marathon and it was one of the most glorious experiences of my life. When…

April 3, 2017

My Story

Let’s begin with: I don’t know what the hell I’m doing. And I’m pretty sure any new parent who says they do is either full of it, delusional, or high. I wing it on a daily basis and pray for the best. That’s a…

March 30, 2017
Mom Advice Mom Stuff Motherlucker

Friends With Mom Benefits

Watching little kids make friends might just be the cutest and most heartbreaking thing in the world. Some are fearless, oblivious to the impending possibility of rejection. Others are tentative and shy, perhaps having been shunned before. Their intentions are rarely anything deeper than…

March 27, 2017
Mom Advice Mom Stuff Motherlucker

Ways To Make New Mom Friends

As a follow up to my last piece on how I found my Mommy Tribe, I’ve compiled a list of ways to find yours. Remember, it’s survival of the fittest, you gotta hit on the hottest mom in class first to make sure everyone…

March 21, 2017