Browsing Tag


Second baby

Surrender vs. Strength

November 14, 2017
It’s 5:00 a.m. and I’ve already been up three times since 9:30 p.m. I’ve basically had one continuous day of segmented sleep for 4 months straight and I’ve found there are only two options on this road of insanity: Surrender or Strength.
I’ve always associated surrender with “giving up.” And because giving up isn’t an option in motherhood, I choose to see surrender as a strategy. It’s almost like a winning-the-war-but-not-this-battle posture. Some days require surrender in order to survive. 
I remember being driven to this place a few times with my first kid. I chose strength most often because it’s where I was most comfortable. And, to be honest, I had more bandwidth for that kind of decision because I only had one child. 
Now, surrender seems, not only more logical most days, but also more empowering. I feel like less of a victim this way.  Maybe it’s an illusion of being more in charge of my own destiny but it’s an illusion I’ll welcome. I’m also more confident in my choice to surrender often because I’m more confident in my strength. Choosing to surrender now and then doesn’t deplete my capacity for strength. That’s the beauty of kid #2. I know I’m capable. I know I’ll get my groove back. And I know it takes way more energy to fake strength while juggling diaper changes and meal time than I’m willing to relinquish. 
So mamas, get strategic about how you need to show up so you can rule the day. For me, as of 5:05 this morning, I’ve already chosen to surrender just to give myself a fighting chance at strength tomorrow. I never thought I’d be proud of that. I hope you are too.  
Mom Stuff Motherlucker

Being Ok With The Now

I was picking Sebastian up from school and ran into a beloved history teacher. He has taught for nearly 50 years and reminds me of Robin William’s character in Dead Poets society. He is wise and weathered and very much to the point. I…

November 6, 2017
Second baby

The Hand Me Down Life

It’s the curse of the second kid isn’t it? They get the shaft in so many ways … attention, gifts, public fanfare, photos. I can’t say I felt guilty about any of it to be honest. I mean, I kind of looked at it…

October 24, 2017
Mom Stuff Motherlucker

Plans For New Plans

Sometimes, life doesn’t turn out the way you expect it to. A stay at home mom was not on my vision board and it’s certainly not on my resume. Not that there is anything wrong with that. If there is one thing I’ve learned…

October 17, 2017
Motherlucker Parenting

Kids Will Be Kids

I have a confession to make – it doesn’t take a whole lot to ruffle my feathers.  As much as I long to be, I am not the kick your feet up, let you hair down, go with the flow kind of gal.  No,…

August 16, 2017
Mom Stuff Motherlucker

What Day Is It? No Seriously…

Anyone without kids who think they know true exhaustion can suck it. I say this with love, but also with a straight face. I have never known the depths of exhaustion until I had kids. I knew what it was like to not sleep…

July 7, 2017

A Snapshot of My Postpartum Depression

Four years ago, I gave birth to a healthy baby boy. A few days after taking him home from the hospital, I became convinced I didn’t want to be his mother. I had made a terrible mistake by having a baby. I had no…

June 1, 2017
Mom Advice Parenting

Girl Time

Ashlyn was 4.5 years old when we went from 3 to Shea party of 4. Meaning she had plenty of time to get good and spoiled. So, when her little brother entered the picture, she endured a humbling transition phase as he required a…

May 30, 2017
Mom Stuff

Bye-Bye Babies

Another Motherlucker recently shared an honest post about “when to start trying”, which is such an exciting and terrifying time for most couples.  Starting a family – holy shit!  You are never fully READY for that season.  But, what happens when that season ends?…

May 25, 2017