As a follow up to my last piece on how I found my Mommy Tribe, I’ve compiled a list of ways to find yours. Remember, it’s survival of the fittest, you gotta hit on the hottest mom in class first to make sure everyone knows you mean business. No one wants to be stuck with the stepford robot mom. Find the messiest, funniest chick in there and lock her up.
- Join a baby-group, playgroup or class. Spend first class quietly assessing and judging potential new friends. Then choose the moms who are the perfect balance of disheveled and confident.
- Hang out at the park. But don’t be creepy about it, so make sure to bring your kid. Let them play in the sand or eat dirt or whatever they’re into these days and casually strike up a convo with another mom. If you’re at the same park, you probably live in the same area, casually mention you’re looking for playdates for your little sand eater and see what happens.
- Be aggressive. B. E. Aggressive. Go on, Mama- ask her out! Sometimes the hardest part is swallowing your nerves and asking your mom crush on a date. Don’t be weird about it, keep it cool and remember to make it something the kids will want to do. That’s way harder to say no to.
- Be realistic. Just because she’s pretty and smells nice doesn’t mean you’re a match. Are your kids close in age? Do you have totally incompatible schedules or views on children? Is she going to judge how often you let your kid eat pizza? Choose wisely and invest your time with parents who make you feel happy, confident and calm.
If at first you don’t succeed- keep at it sister friend! It takes time, but it’s so worth it. Having a friend (or few if you’re super lucky) who will laugh her ass off when you get kicked out of the library because your toddler is shouting “Fuck”, cry her eyes out when you miscarry, listen her ears off when you need it, and share her heart out on the daily is one of the things that makes motherhood so special.